Friday, April 6, 2012

"She Ratchet!"

Ratchet: to start acting a hot mess in public; serious fuckery, tomfoolery, or other such shenanigans; to be ghetto. to be unclassyAdjective: it describes a person or activity that is out of hand, out of control, or generally whack in some way.


I know that I can come across as a classy, dignified and sofisifated (I realize I spelled this wrong, just in case the spelling police hit my page) lady but...I have another side.*Shaking my head in shame* I love ratchet things. Okay now I do have my limits but sometimes I do get caught up on http://www.mediatakeout.com and for a bit I was all about the Real Housewives of Atlanta. I don't watch anymore because that deserves a stamp of "When Ratchness Goes Wrong". I do however occasionally watch Mob Wives <---but those ladies are hood and not ratchet and from what I understand, there is a difference. And although I detest what the shows stand for…sometimes I can get sucked into Basketball Wives/Love and Hip Hop. I can be so weak *tear, tear*



*Disclaimer* I don't wear kanekalon wet and wavy #4 plus #1b, in a ponytail all down my back while sporting green contacts and sweatpants with juicy written across the butt topping it off with a cut off shirt with BITCH bedazzled on it all the while popping on some bubblicious bubble gum- watermelon flavored.


My ratchetness is really lies with music. Some of it…I really love. I fall victim to the Chris Rock, “if they beat is right, she’ll dance all night” syndrome.  It’s something about those beats or the cadence of the chorus and then BOOM I find myself singing right along with it “Cake, Cake, Cake, Cake, Cake”. Now some people may say think this music is something new…but it really isn't. I had to do some soul searching and I came to the realization that I was a fan of ratchet music before we even started calling things ratchet. Hell for a minute we called in Miami Bass. Really, Luke is like the Godson (the Godfather would be those nasty ole men of the blues- looking at you Clarence Carter) of ratchet music…exhibit A “Hey we want some pussy” <--that still makes me blush and that song came out what, over 20 years ago?

It doesn’t stop there, other infamous ratchet “themes”- DJ Quick’s “Bitch better have my money” or Akinyele’s “Put it in your mouth” (1996). There are more… Khia had us All telling guys “lick it now, lick it good” <--she wasn’t talking about envelopes or stamps either. And then remember Hurricane Chris- he had a whole song about being ratchet-he wanted to start a ratchet movement (I don’t know, but he may have succeeded).  It’s just, back in the day, we only heard these songs in clubs or through the headphones of our walkman (haha remember walkmans- sorry). Now all you have to do is turn on the radio and “Make it Rain Trick” or “Toot it and Boot” can blast through your speakers courtesy of your local radio station.


Now before people think this is an old head complaining about this overtly sexually explicit music of today…press pause-I’m not.  (press play) I understand why it’s out; it gets the people going and that translates to downloads, albums sales and Dollars; so I know it’s not going away. And honestly…I’m glad. A sister needs something to jam to on her way home from work (I just have to remember not to pull up at church blasting 2 Chains- I got some dirty looks last time).

GUCCI!

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