"Mad Monday"

sigh...I know that I can be very cynical and even pessimistic at times -yes, it's true, I can be a "Charlie Brown" while being a Linus for others. Yet even I have to say that reading comments on online article posts can leave me feeling like "what the French?" is wrong with people? 

Cyber gangsters are THE WORSE! They sit at home in front of their computers (iPad, MAC, PC) and proceed to blast and spew their negativity all over the comment box. I have seen negative comments on things dealing with the military and I think to myself, if it wasn't for these very same people you wouldn't be allowed to make such comments. Long gone are they days when people would write to the newspaper- leaving their name and city. See cyber gangster don't have the balls to be an editorial gangster; because an editorial gangster will have to back up what they say. If they get caught out there in the streets then-they will argue in person- GASP!- yes in person. I know the internet has made it impossible for some people to know how to carry on a face to face conversation. It's something we used to do in the "olden days". Editorial gangsters have conviction in their beliefs and will stand up for them. They won't say things online behind the guise of a made up name (not realizing their IP address makes them traceable)...sigh. 

On most occasions I try to avoid the comments sections because I already know...and it doesn't even matter...human interest story, finance story, US story, entertainment, sports etc- a cyber gangster will be there with their little gang of merry men leaving dumb, asinine comments for all the world to see

Shade doesn't matter

A Letter to my people,

You know what perhaps I should apologize and say that this is no means an attack on you. I even thought of sending out letters to my Brothers and then another to my Sisters but I figure this might be easier...buffet style. 

So allow me to pile a heaping of observation on your plate.

Our little girls. Our young girls. The future of our race. The mothers of our future leaders. They need you. They need you to tell them they are beautiful, they are smart, they can achieve if they believe –

and any other rhyming motivational speech.

Do you realize many of our young girls aspire to be video models? 
Video vixens...video actresses...video hoes. None of them aspire to the director of the video or even the stylist on the set but one of the girls in the video.  Have you noticed they (the videos) rarely use dancers…like the-I went to school - studied dance for several years - auditioned for this video with the choreographer & director - then for a week before production practiced-learned the dance - now I am on set actually dancing-one and two and kick ball change, type dancer? The young girl is just gyrating to the beat or back shots are shown as she moves seductively around the room.  The video barely even goes with the song anymore....they are clichéd and they all look alike. 
Where are Hype, Billie, F Gary Gray...sorry I am getting off subject? 

What was I saying...oh…the young girls just want to be the eye candy in the videos.

Why because that's what boys like and I want boys to the like me. Or I wish I had longer hair and lighter skin because that's what the boys like and I want boys to like me. And if you think the dark skin/ light skin drama has gone away...think again…it hasn't.

Okay I know I am "one of the darker sisters on campus" and while I never had a deep seeded issue with it, I recognized as a young girl that I was not what was classified as "beautiful". I did. Guys liked girls that looked liked Gina from Martin. Pam, the browner sister, was the best friend that often got clowned because of her weave. And while I know in my mind this issue is one that has been beaten into my people, I really thought that in 2011 it was one that wouldn't pop up in the middle schools and high schools of today. That is until my pretty little brown cousin asked me “why guys only liked light skinned, thick girls with long hair?”

I was taken aback! I was like- how do you figure that!? And then she quoted Lil Wayne's opening sentence in "Every Girl"... ("I like a long haired thick red bone").   I just shook my head and told her that all guys aren't like that and that is just a song. Some guys might have a preference but also told her that if a guy Only wants to date you based on your skin complexion and not because you are Freakin Awesome- he is a loser. 

Before you jump on my case, read that sentence again; yes if I guy only wants to date someone solely because she is lighter or darker and not give her credit for her personality then he is a shallow loser. What’s gonna happen in the summer time when the lighter gets dark or in the winter time when the darker gets light- we gone break up? Exactly…well she laughed and agreed but then shared with me a story about a friend of hers (a dark sister) and she wanted to "talk" <--remember when we used to say that...to this young man in their class. The young man agreed that that the girl was funny and mad cool but declined. Why...because she was "too dark".

To that I told my little cousin, his loss and he is a loser.

Brothers, you're probably saying oh you being too hard on shorty and perhaps I am but at the risk of losing my pretty little brown cousin-I can get harder. I hope she never hears things like, "you're pretty for a dark girl". Or when a light skinned girl walks by, hear the guys she is hanging out with say "she is ugly, that's a waste of a light skinned girl" as though the notion is light is right and down with brown . In the words of Rodney King, "why can't we all get along"? Sisters you aren't exempt...many of you are just as color struck BUT then will get three quarters pissed at a brother for being struck with that same fever. Shade doesn't matter. Assholes come in all shades but so do charming, incredibly wonderful people. 

Why not recognize that all shades of brown are so beautiful. Caramel, butter pecan, mocha, dark chocolate, etc…It's one of the many things that makes us so unique and oh so beautiful.

  

That Killer P or D

I heard the most crazy, extremely twisted story yesterday. It began with a series of "SHUT UP!!" and "That did NOT happen" but ended with "Oh my God, that is so sad".

The root of the sadness surrounding this story is arguable but I'm going to say it started out with some...coochie. Naw, this was some Killer Pussy. First let me say I don't like the word pussy...it makes me feel uncomfortable, kind of dirty (but not in a Pussycat Dolls way). Call me a prude but I don't care...I don't like the word. So from here on out when I say Killer P or KP - pussy is what I am referring to.

Now back to business of this Killer P and Killer D.

I remember a time when this guy was like "Baby, Imma put it on you" and to most women that would be a welcomed challenge...uh not me. Lol! I'm serious. I was like, Don't "put it on me" man-I'm good. Just make me feel good and have me remember you there but please don't put it on me. I don't want to go to jail behind your Killer D. I mean- hey I can admit it. I have been sprung before (maybe once or twice). Most people won't admit it but hey, I'm grown and I don't even know if anyone is really going to read this. Anyway, there I was- as sprung as I could be-riding across town in hurricane like weather or loaning out money or taking days off and missing work but NEVER have I done something that was going to have me wearing silver bracelets (not behind the D). No sir and that's because I don't want anyone to "put it on me". I have consoled girls that have had that Killer D put on them. That Killer D will have you so gone...it's crazy (refer to my previous blog about sexting).

Oh fellas aren't exempt...Killer P don't have guys doing any better. It'll have you sitting outside her house watching it...waiting for the next dude to show up so you can jump out and beat his ass...and then you going to jail.  Killer P will have you break into her house, ransack it, and then take a shit in her tub (true story)...and then you going to jail. Killer P will have you...hell in some cases kill. Is KP really that good? I mean "dang homie, in high school you were the man homie, what the eff happened to you"...Killer P happened to that guy.

So next time you getting caught up listening to all these songs about "Beating it up", "Lay it Down", "Motivation" etc remember DON'T DO IT! Don't become a victim of the Killer P or D. Stay out of jail.

You Tubin It

Updated- removed links that no longer work...

You tube is not just for watching puppies bark at their reflections in mirrors or watching babies make faces at their Daddies when they get scared. It's also not just for people to upload silly moments of themselves in hopes of the video becoming viral and then landing them as a feature on Today, Good Morning America, or whatever that other morning news show is that stays on for like four hours each day. I mean really who is watching ALL four hours of these shows? I had a point somewhere...oh here it is.

I like television. There I said it. I always find it funny when people say things like "I don't care for television" because then I wonder what is wrong with me. I mean I have "shows" that I follow...and I would like to believe I am not a slave to the boob tube (maybe to the DVR). But that isn't my point either...it's somewhere around here.

Oh, so in watching television I have noticed the massive influx of reality television shows and quite frankly it's exhausting. I mean you switch the channel from one hot mess to another and you get wrapped up in it and it's easy because people love to watch a train wreck. I mean look at the weight loss shows ratings, Dr. Drew (he keeps getting picked up)- and his celebrities and their rehab or them lil young teen moms, to any show with a derivative of the word wife in it. Whew...exhausting.

I try to support scripted shows. Great writing produces great moments. I mean I grew up when television was still pretty awesome. Cosby Show, Different World, Growing Pains, In Living Color, Benson, Golden Girls, etc.  I mean I watched the Golden Girls like 20 years ago (dang that sounds long ago) and I watched some reruns last week and Still laughed. Great moments...so where can we find those great moments once again. Sure there are a few shows still around that have great writing but you have to find them through all the mess. So where else can you search....(my point of all this) YOU TUBE!

I have been telling friends about a few web series that are well written, funny, and relatable. I encourage people to stop looking at the kitten sleeping and check some of these out. If you know of some others-please pass them along.

1. Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl (ABG) has developed quite a following. With one season already posted, fans are anxiously anticipated the second second which begins this Thursday (I am super stoked).

http://www.youtube.com/user/actingrl112

2. Black and Single TV is new. Only about 4 episodes posted. It follows the lives of Oni and Jesse. Two young, single, black professionals that work in the same building and are seemingly perfect for one another BUT they never meet- they intersect each others lives at various moments. I hope they eventually meet but then again I don't. The writer/director Jay Ali, also a Hollywood actor, felt compelled to create the show because he didn't like how African Americans were being portrayed on network television- basically poor writing, production and a rise in hot mess reality television (my description, not his).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHq6N0vln64

3. Black and Sexy is another new series. A homeboy put me onto this show. And surprise you may see a familiar face (if you looked at ABG like I told you to). Black and Sexy is a bit different as it runs two different story lines- The Couple and The Number plus they have skits intermingled (please check out Hang Up! Ditto). Oh and the creators of the series have a movie "A Good Day to be Black & Sexy". You can check out new episodes every Sunday 7pm Eastern/4pm Pacific.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MznvuZViIYw&list=PL3C473FF68FB4CC44&feature=plcp

There's more...
Here is one from across the pond-
Brothers With No Game http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdq610XNhxs these brothers even have their own website/blog http://www.brotherswithnogame.com/

One starring one of the stars of Pariah & Friday Night Lights-Aasha Davis
The Unwritten Rules http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deFq9n8isIw&feature=relmfu

Happy viewing! 6/12/12

Spare the rod...Spoil the news story

Okay I'll say...I feel bad for Creflo Dollar. Yeah that's what I said- I mean just this week though.
I do because he has just become the poster child/man of black men beating on their kids. But need not worry because tomorrow and especially this coming Sunday, we will be talking about the black men that don't take care of their kids at all. I guess a black man is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.

Honestly I am not understanding...I mean...well I guess I am not understanding why this has gotten so much press. I've read blogs from those opposed to spanking but let me just say this all those opposed to spanking- let's face it at 15 hell naw you don't get spanked- you get handled. I'm sorry but it's true. Or maybe that was my house. And at 15, iffn at 1 am, I told my mother I was going out- well she would laugh because obviously I was auditioning for Def Jam. And if I told her I don't want to talk to her right now then I would have probably had the taste slapped out my mouth (that's only happened to me once and it takes a few hours for the taste to return-think hangover with a hand print).

Those for spanking as a form of discipline- hey Right on. Okay seriously, only you know your child. Only you will know if the punishment method, taking the car, phone, television away is working. I think it's still called being grounded right. And if grounding your child has resulted in zero results then hey you know you are going to have to reevaluate your strategy. And vice versa. If all you do is spank, snatch some of those privileges away and see if you get better results. Again- you know your child.

Keeping it real, do I really think he punched his daughter in the face...not really. Do I really think he probably wanted to...oh yes sir. My sister is 30 years old that there are times when I know my daddy wants to punch her in the face behind some of the things she says. But he doesn't. He walks away and has some back medicine. People have been comparing Creflo to Chris Brown, Ike Turner...look we don't know what happened that night but to call the man an abuser-I think it's pretty harsh. Yet that's what we do. We take the private moments, seconds that cannot be returned and wage an all out battle in decency and morality all the while never holding the mirror to our own faces.

I have read comments where someone said, we forget teenagers are people too which is a bold face lie. No we don't- that's why they are still alive (duh). Some tenagers tend to forget that we are adults. I have been around teenagers and the things they say make me blush and I'm like hey an adult is present you might want to watch your mouth and your tone. Teenagers don't respect adults because they are too busy trying to act like one.

I am not saying that we need to go around beating on teenagers or choking them out even though I am sure there are some residents in Chicago that would disagree. Disciplining your child doesn't always involve a strap or a slap sometimes your child can move because you applied some bass to your voice. But hey, all kids aren't like that and that's normal. Some like to test the waters...you tell them the stove is hot and they still touch it just to make sure. That's life. *And the stove is this situation literal or figurative*

Lastly, I hope that this situation brings the Dollar (wait a minute, can we all agree that is a funny name) family together and not further divide them. I hope it makes families look at themselves, maybe not so much in comparison but ask okay what could have been done differently. Have open dialogue with teenagers and ask their opinions about the situation. Oh and don't worry about this story being around long...it won't. By the time the real story or better details surface- we will be on the another story. Stay prayed up TD and Joel (I mean since the devil is targeting mega church pastors he is almost done in Atlanta and might be heading to Texas).

Peanut Butter & Jelly