Friday, September 27, 2013

Where are the men?

Isn’t this a conversation girlfriends have at least once a month?
Every two weeks?
Shoot from some of us every week.
I dare not say everyday.

So where are they? They have been several theories as to why women are single- especially black women. Too picky, too judgmental, too crazy, too fat, too skinny, too ugly, too much drama, too mean, too loud, too- too-too mutha effing too…what is a woman to do?

I can name five beautiful, great, terrific women, right now, that are single. These women aren’t just single, these women aren’t dating- no prospects…single. And it has me confused. On paper and yes I said on paper, these women have it going on. Their own place some even homeowners, career or great jobs (there is a difference), degree holders or college students. They have good credit, good personalities; just good catches all around but still single.
Now I would be remiss if I didn’t say that each one didn’t have issues they were dealing with, but who doesn’t? Show me someone that doesn’t have any issues and I will say to you “hey you do know we are standing in a cemetery right” (meaning these folks are dead so of course they don’t have any issues).

Sometimes I wonder, if I was a guy…first off, I’d have a lot of explaining to do-sorry…would I be one that wanted to enjoy the fact that there are just so many women at my disposal or would I be like the female me and want to be in a loving relationship.

I honestly think men have it so much easier when it comes to getting into a relationship and I’m sure there are men that disagree with me but I can’t help how I feel. I just do.

So back to my opening question where are the men? And honest question- what is a guy looking for in a potential mate? I know that preferences and tastes change from person to person but I think most women want the same basic thing; a man who is a good person, honest, has all his teeth, smells nice, easy on the eyes, and has a nice personality. I’m sure this sounds like a thirteen year old wrote it…probably because that when we start thinking about what a boyfriend should be like.

While I do not endorse his newfound relationship guru status, Steve Harvey constantly says on his show that a woman holds all the cards in a relationship. She is the one that sets the tone. She has to let the guy know what she will deal with or not deal with and if he can’t hang then she needs to move on. I find this pretty interesting coming from a twice divorced guy…but I guess the third time is a charm. Now lets say that all that is true that still doesn’t mean that a woman will find her ideal mate which leads me to another piece of advice Mr. Harvey offered…don’t be so selective and perhaps date older. I would like to go on record and say just because a guy is older than you DOES not mean that he has his shit together. And what exactly is selective. I think if I said my ideal mate would be 6’6, one hazel eye, one brown, looked like Boris Kodjoe, could cook like that Neeley guy, and made six figures-that would constitute as unrealistic standards because where would I meet this guy…surely not in the places my extremely less than six figures earning ass frequent. I mean unless this guy likes the $1.50 movie.

I’d like to note that many men frequent the $1.50 movie theater but these men typically are trying to compete for homecoming king.

Where are the men, well I don't know. So let the search begin…to be continued. 

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