Sunday, May 8, 2011

but what if I get robbed

This is one of those rare occasions where my randomness is going to shine through like a sunny day. Honestly I don’t even remember what made this pop into my head but once it was there, I knew it would stay there until I wrote about it. So wrote a blog about it, like to read it…here it go, hmmm might keep that for future use, I like it (see random).

I think people that sleep in the nude are some of the bravest people. When I say people that sleep in the nude, I mean the people that sleep like this on the regular. They get out of the shower, lotion up and slide in between their cool sheets and drift off into a deep sleep. Drooling, snoring, farting and all…See me, yeah I'm not gonna be able to do that. I mean please, of course I have slept in the nude before but it wasn’t planned and even then (on those rare occasions where the opportunity arises for me to sleep in the nude…sigh…I remember it well…sorry) I would usually wake up and put on some clothes. I mean- what if someone breaks in…no for real what if someone breaks in?!

I mean, first let me say, Thank God I have never been a victim of a home invasion and pray to never become one in the future. But there is one thing I know…I cannot be laying in the bed butt booty naked if a robber rolls up in my house. I can’t have just anybody looking at all my goodness. Or looking at me like WOW…you really need to put some clothes on. The robber gonna act like I’m disrespecting him? Do you realize what that could do to my self esteem? I mean I’m getting robbed by a shallow and stuck up thief! To be rejected. Criticized. Even though he is probably mad because he broke in and realized that I don't have any high dollar items so he is just being rude. Now I know what you’re thinking, why would it matter what he thinks? And to that I say, get with the program- this is a blog about random thoughts. This anit algebra and to answer your question, I say...How dare a thief look at me like I'm wrong? Like I can't sleep in the nude. Shoot he knows he wants this. Okay wait a minute this has taken a severely wrong turn some where. Let me get back on track. 

I don’t mind sleeping without a shirt on-because hey sometimes it gets hot. And my top is usually something that comes off at like three in the morning when for some reason the air gets stuffy- but that is really besides the point. The point is...bottoms off- weird. Who sleeps in just a tee shirt? A tee shirt and no underwear- what in the world is that about? I mean what if the tee shirt rides up while you are tossing and tearing and your butt is exposed. Your butt just out the air. You know that's how you catch a cold! Just put on some boxers or something-but hey I'm not judging-not at all. I just think it's weird. 

Again I would like to reiterate my opening statement...this is very random. I know this. I can't even remember why this popped in my head. Maybe I was watching a movie or something. Or maybe it was a conversation I had with a friend- so really you should blame all of those things, because if they hadn't planted the random seed, I wouldn't have felt the need to water, cultivate, watch it grow and then present you with this bouquet of randomness.


  1. OH MY DAMN!! Is all Imma say!!!! I'm out...this is why you are my girl TJ!

  2. Lmao! ftr I sleep in tshirt and undies. Hehe. Kels!